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I need help with my proposal essay. I already made it but it need fix in grammar, sentences and also my thesis statement. You will see that  I already add the street name and how narrow is the road but maybe i added in the wrong place. This is what my teacher also said:

First, you need to delete or erase the last sentence of the first paragraph. That sentence is supposed to be your thesis, and the thesis for your paper should be written like this: “To solve this situation, __________ should ____________________________________________.” You need to say WHO should do something, and then say very specifically what should be done. That is all the information that you need in this sentence, your thesis sentence. You don’t need to announce all the things your paper is going to do or to refer to your own paper while you are writing your paper.  

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In your second paragraph, you might consider some specifics about how narrow the road is. You could measure the road’s width and give a specific dimension. 

Finally, one objection you will need to consider is from many of the people who live on that road. To widen the road, the road construction company is going to have to take parts of people’s yards and property. They will also have to tear up people’s yards and property as they will be driving on it, standing on it, paving it, and so on. Is everyone on your road willing to accept that they will have to lose a little of their front yards and that on some days they may have workers driving and walking around in their yards until the road is finally widened and repaired? You will need to mention that all of you are okay with this, OR you will have to explain to those who are not okay with this why they should be okay with it. You will have to comfort them in some way or offer them something in return for their losses. 

[Last Name] 1


Ambar Jones

Mr. Martin

English 1113

31 Marzo 2021

Proposal for Better Roads

The great Roman Empire was connected by an immense road network, allowing its citizens to walk from Britain to the Tigris-Euphrates River Basin without interruptions. Roads have always allowed humanity to travel with relative ease, improving efficiency and avoiding unnecessary harm to traveling methods. While roads may have come to fame in antiquity, they still serve a modern purpose. People around the United States use the highway system to travel between states, and more locally to visit friends, neighbors, and relatives. In my little town roads 102 Catherine Dr. Should be bustling with citizens off to see those closest to them are clogged with lines of cars like ants, single file squashed like sardines in a can. Two lane roads are a stable within America yet they are as common as elephants in my town. Everytime I drive I see cars struggling to fit on each side of the road; people are forced to slow down in order to accommodate their fellow drivers voiding the efficiency roads normally provide. The following paper will outline the problem, a proposed solution, and explore possible negatives to the proposed solution, ending with alternate solutions that workaround perceived drawbacks.

As alluded to early the primary problem with roads in my town, specifically the road I live on, is their width 9 to 16 ft. Cars can no longer drive side by side, delegating a normal flow of traffic to a snail’s pace. Without a lane for the opposite direction of traffic drivers are forced into dangerous confrontations with their fellow humans with no clear resolution in sight. While some may claim that this problem is a mere inconvenience, its impacts overblown, they have clearly never driven down a narrow one lane road. Beyond stress that deters people from driving, accidents are abundant because of the disruption of normal traffic patterns. People are taught to drive within their lane, not play high stakes bumper cars with no clear right away, leading to confusion and thus accidents. One does not have to search far and wide to deduce the cause of this problem, simply put the road construction limited the road width. The road has always been this size, and thus the initial planning and construction of the road are to fault for the current width problem.

Understanding the root cause of the problem allows a solution to be tailored to fix the roads specific needs. Thus, the solution necessitates a renovation of the road, either adding on to the old construction or tearing up the old and building a new road entirely. Ensuring that at minimum there are two, well marked and up to safety and transportation code lanes would go a long way to solving the accident problem plaguing the road I live on. The major benefit of my solution is that it addresses the root cause of the issue, the initial construction. Without fixing the underlying problem, road construction limiting width, the presenting problem, driving related stress and accidents, can never be solved. Instead of putting a bandaid on a bullet wound, implementing alternative measures, I urge taking the bullet out all together, adding additional width. Furthermore, enhancing the current road allows the standard of two lane roads to persist, making driving all together easier because people drive on roads like the new one all the time. Reducing the variables in driving allows operators of motor vehicles to focus on the task at hand, driving their car or other vehicle.

Some may argue that my proposed solution is too expensive, why waste taxpayer dollars to fix a road when signage about a narrow road ahead would sificie. However, the opposition fails to realize that signs fall victim to vandalism, bad weather, and general wear and tear that require them to be replaced. Furthermore, while signs are a less expensive option, they do not create nearly as much economic growth as new infrastructure, road construction does. While harming taxpayers negligibly, building a new road gives local construction companies in the area, many who have been hit hard by the COVID-19 pandemic, much needed work. The money that they earn and then spend in the economy would more than offset the marginal cost to taxpayers. Lastly, signage would be inadequate as it would not fix the underlying cause of accidents, road width. Even with signs directing drivers who have the right of way, people will invariably miss the signs and cause an accident. Only by fixing the root cause of the problem, only by removing the bullet, can accidents be reduced in the long term.

Alternate solutions do exist to problems mentioned previously. Instead of a normal tax levied on citizens my local government could host fundraisers and apply for federal government grants to shoulder some of the monetary burden for new roads. Alternatively, drivers can be told to take alternate routes, however this is unlikely to have longer term impacts because humans are creatures of habit and follow the same roads that they have always used.

Overall, roads play a vital part of my and the people in my community’s lives. For too long our local government has neglected its duty to provide safe roadways to its citizens. Narrow roads do not just exist on the street I live on, but around my community. While the cost of the roads may be significant, the lives lost in accidents because of government neglect will irrevocably damage our community. We have to act by urging our local government to broaden our roads so our community can broaden its horizons by reducing injury due to preventable accidents

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